The hardest lesson in parenting is learning how to keep it together, and working well with others…kind of like learning how to share or play with other kids… except, this is real life. SO -as a new parent, you should learn how to engage in a support system. My support system consisted of my husband, some of my family, and my lactation consultant. Let me start off by saying – we made the decision to breastfeed early on…I think it’s one of the best gifts I could ever give my kids. I was nervous, but my doctor reassured me that it’s very rare for mothers to be unable to produce enough milk. If breastfeeding doesn’t work, like in my case …there’s always pumping! So that brings me to my twins… They were born at 33 weeks gestation. Which means they didn’t learn any of the sucking reflexes yet….They were hooked up to all sorts of beeping and blinking machines..and were SO fragile.. I didn’t get the change to breastfeed.. lucky for me, my biggest supporter…and my lactation consultant motivated me to pump for them. And a few days after they were born.. voila! mommy became a milk making machine!! by the end of their NICU stay, I had the most containers of milk in the fridge/ freezer at the NICU….whoa!
The family members that weren’t “grossed” out by it were great! I love feeling comforted by family who cared about our decisions… One thing that bothered me was when I would tell my story (because I’m so proud), some people would say things like “I tried and couldn’t” …like you have to justify to me why you didn’t breastfeed? Rule #1 – don’t do that.. as much as you want sympathy from me.. I’m making this work and I’m really proud of myself…sooo… time to move on.
You need a support system, because without one.. you won’t be successful. All the long nights, the logging ounces…bagging, tagging and freezing milk.. Change in diet.. don’t eat this… eat more of that… It’s tiring.. no doubt.. but I would NEVER change a single thing..
I’ve always wanted to share my thoughts, stories or notes. I never really knew what I could share until I had twins. Now I have SO much. When we found out we were having twins, I don’t think we were prepared…but really, who is ever prepared for kids? I don’t really think it dawned on us that we were going to be parents, until my water broke.. then it got real.Although, in the same breath, I honestly didn’t feel like a parent until they came home, which was 17 days after birth. Coming home at night was the hardest thing because I would have to pass their bedroom at night knowing they weren’t in there. Seeing our children grow in these little isolette’s wired up was sad.
Fast forward one year, our twins are health, happy, and entering the world of talking and walking!!! So, what’s it like being a twin mom? It’s busy!!! Early on, we got the best advice we ever needed, get them on a schedule…so we did. The same schedule..that way, when it’s 3 a.m, and one is screaming..the other could use a meal as well. Believe me, you’ll be happy you did..especially one year later….when they’re still on the same schedule.. and you can go pee in between meals, and playtime.. oh you’ll thank whoever gave you that piece of advice.
What’s it like being a twin mom? Well…I always want to use the word “organized chaos”.. but really, it’s just busy.. I’ve always hear of moms saying ” I have no time for a shower” or something like that, I couldn’t understand why? to this day, I always have time for a shower, for a phone call to my mom or dad…to get a drink of water or to swap over the laundry.. So, what I’m trying to say is.. you need a support system… Your husband is your greatest instrument..use it wisely and make sure you show appreciation for that. Not many dads are super hands on, but husband is..and for that i’m lucky and forever grateful.
Twins are cool, the way they interact with each other is amazing. They may not get along all the time, but on my way home from daycare..listening to them making each other giggle.. is the prettiest sound a mom will ever hear. I hope that they do this when they’re teenagers and full of raging hormones! Keep wishing mom? 🙂